I got in a big fight with my best friend yesterday. We both said some things we regret but we also worked things ok. This past week has been so draining, i'm glad its over. Between guys, kids' and BF's.

I like 2 guys and could possibly love 1 or both of them. 1 is available and a pain in my rear for the last 10 years. The other is not available and keeps playing games, just told him I was done. I tried to help him and got accused of stuff that was not my fault. Told him when we was or if he ever is ready to call me.

On Tuesday I got the aid position in 1st grade to find out its not a paid position, WTF. I had been told time and time again that they did not want 2 people from the same church in the same room as teacher/aid. Fine so why did they hire BF her and teacher go to same church. This were said but we talked them out. I was upset for reason I think I can be upset about and BF didn't know what they were and thought I was jealous and being childish. Once we talked them out she agreed that my feeling were valid. I am up at the school from 730 to 530-600 almost everyday and none of it I get paid for. I love doing and I'm not going to stop, but being paid a little even if its helped with tution would be nice. I also told her I love her she is my 1 BF that I can tell anything and everything,too. She said I had been a crappy friend. Which part is true. She we joined 3 schools the amount of friends I have made has become crazy lol. I like it but I don't know how to balance it all. I am glad we were able to work things out. I do love her.

The Big One and I have been fighting most of the week. I hate it, makes me feel like a bad parent. This coming Thursday marks the 10th anni. of his fathers death and the following Tuesday he will be 11. I hate the first couple weeks of Feb. So this week is The Big One and I weekend. The Small One is at grandmas. We are going to go to the movies and then come home and hang out.

I think on wednesday I am going to take my computer in to get fixed and get another small laptop to hold me over. I am going to go get ready to go to the movies. I think The Big One is getting ready to finally wake up, lol.